Party Rules and Practices

Scott & Rachel’s Party Rules and Practices

This is the July 2018 edition of our practices and rules in order to keep things running well at our parties. We’re constantly looking for ways to make the parties a better experience for everyone involved. We will amend and update these practices and rules as needed.

Party Invitations
Our parties are by-invitation events at a private residence and we respectfully ask you to regard your invitation as being to you and your significant others and children. However, we love to meet new people. If you’re hoping to bring someone from off-list, ask us in advance and, assuming we say yes, introduce them to us as soon as you arrive. Make sure that they’re folks who will be comfortable with a geek/pagan/poly crowd. Please don’t forward or cross-post the invitation.

Please discuss any specific concerns about the invitation list with us, preferably ahead of time.

Getting Hold of Rachel or Scott
Our phone numbers will be posted in the main party areas. We’ll have our phones with us and can be called at any point during the party.

General Party Safety and Well-being
We feel strongly about people feeling safe at our parties. Creepy, threatening, harassing, unsafe, or other unacceptable behavior will not be tolerated at our parties. If somebody is making you feel uncomfortable or unsafe, please let us know as soon as you can. We will work with you to find a preferred outcome.

If you think there’s a situation at our house that may require calling the police, tell us so we can evaluate the situation,  and work with the police if necessary. If it’s an immediately life-threatening situation then call 911 but notify us at once. In general, we view calling the police to our house as unacceptable.

Party Volunteers
We love doing these big parties. They’re a huge amount of work but feel like a very worthwhile community event. We really, really appreciate the help that people give with them. Helping out includes party setup and cleanup, changing over trash and recycling, replenishing table supplies, driving people between Oak Grove and our house, grilling, and fire marshalling.

Swimming Pool and the Pool Area

  • Children under the age of 13 in the pool area (this means anywhere inside the pool gate, not just in the water) must be watched by a parent (or specified adult, with their consent) at all times.
  • If that adult is not in the pool area, the child must not be either. This may occasionally feel difficult, but it’s a fundamental rule of pool safety.
  • Do not bring glass into the pool area. This includes any bottles or glass cups or containers. Breakage is rare, but any broken glass in the pool area becomes an immediate serious hazard.
  • A bathing suit or reasonable equivalent is required; our neighbors are mundane and can see into the pool area. Please bring (and bring home) your own towels.

Party Space and Not Party Space
The main bedroom upstairs will be quiet space for nursing mothers and other folks who need a few minutes of less crowd and noise. This is not kid play space or romantic space. Please respect the signs which say Not Party Space and don’t open those doors.

For the comfort and enjoyment of all attending, we ask for thoughtful and appropriate control to be exerted over the behavior of children. Please be aware of what your kids are doing, and how it may be affecting other people at the party. If this is likely to be difficult, consider leaving them at home with a babysitter.

There are, currently, no animals in residence in our house.  Please don’t bring pets, for allergy reasons. Please let us know in advance if your attendance at the party requires a service animal.

Our parties are pot-luck events and we’re very grateful to the people who bring food and drink to share.

  • Storage for to-be grilled foods is in a cooler under the grill table; please put your name and a list of ingredients on your food.
  • If you brought something that you are waiting to eat, stay nearby when it is grilled so you get some. (Effort will be made to find you if your name is on it.)
  • People get cooking, queues of food to be cooked get long, be patient and check frequently.
  • If you have a special dietary need (e.g. vegetarian, vegan, celiac, specific ingredient allergy) let the grillers know and if a section of the grill needs to be scraped clean, they’ll do the best they can, when they can.

General notes:

  • Label all items with the ingredients or keep the packaging.
  • We can’t guarantee complete ingredient lists or freedom from cross-contamination. People with food allergies or other dietary requirements must use their own judgement.
  • Use disposable containers and/or label your container. (Please be responsible for claiming containers.)

Yes, we have alcohol. Yes, you must be at least 21 to drink at our parties, and under-age drinking will not be tolerated. We welcome your alcohol contributions, and they can go directly to the designated alcohol table inside the house. Please enjoy responsibly. If you’ve had too much, let us know and we’ll arrange safe transport or crash space.

Lost and Found
We post a lost-and-found list after each party. If you’re missing something that we didn’t list, please contact us. If we have something of yours, arrange with us to get it returned. We’ll hold things until the next party if we haven’t identified the owner, after that they may get disposed of.

On-street parking is readily available all around our area, but Melrose is very strict about the No Parking On-Street After 2AM rule and will ticket cars. Waivers are available but they require one to be filled out for each separate car. We’ll have a stack of waiver forms and would prefer to deliver them to the police station earlier rather than later in the evening.

Please avoid parking on the little side street by our house and be considerate of the neighbors, especially late at night. In particular, when leaving late at night if your car or bike has loud pipes, please resist the temptation to show them off. We value having a peaceable relationship with our neighbors.

Music and Performance
Feel free to bring acoustic instruments and jam.  If you want to bring amplified instruments or perform a concert, get in touch with us and see if we can do that. At the summer parties, we welcome fire performance in the driveway after dark.  The fire marshals have the last word on all fire performance and fire safety matters.


  • When watching the fire-spinning please stay off the neighbors’ lawns.
  • There is no smoking (of anything), vaping, or recreational drug use anywhere on the property.
  • Crash space is only available by special arrangement.
  • Melrose noise ordinances start at 11 PM, accordingly we request that outdoor music stops at 10:50 PM.